Whether we’d like to think about it or not, we will all face a crisis at some point in our lives. The question is how will we respond when crisis comes knocking on our door? Will we crumble underneath the pressure and stop living, or will we persevere? If you want to stand through a crisis and come out on top, you must follow these principles.

1.) Choose Faith Over Fear

One of the most important things you can do when you face a crisis is to choose a response of faith over fear.

Shortly after I came home from open heart surgery in 2007, I had a follow up appointment with my local family physician to take some chest x-rays, examine my incision, and discuss my medications. No sooner than we returned home after the appointment, the office called my husband with results from the x-ray, and told him he needed to immediately bring me to the emergency room, because I was about to have an aneurysm.

My husband was trying his best to remain calm as he asked the nurse clarifying questions, but I could see by the look on his face, that something was wrong.

Before he even hung up, I asked, “What’s the matter? What are they saying?”

“They said I needed to bring you to the hospital right away. Your x-ray showed that you might be having an aneurysm,” he said with tears.

I quickly retorted, “I’ll go, but I AM NOT having an aneurysm! There’s no way. The doctor’s fixed my problem and they wouldn’t have let me come home if they didn’t think I was able to recover peacefully at home!”

We raced to the hospital only to be told that the doctors weren’t really sure what was happening, but they’d like to put an I.V. in me just in case. Instead of allowing them to admit me, we made a tough decision to drive to Indianapolis to see the specialist who performed my surgery.

For nearly three hours as we drove down to Indianapolis, we hardly said a word to each other. We just held hands, and I told myself, “I will live and not die and proclaim what the Lord has done. I will live and not die and proclaim what the Lord has done. I will live and not die and proclaim what the Lord has done” (Psalm 118:17).

We arrived at the specialist’s office and after looking at the same x-ray I received back home he said, “You’re not having an aneurysm. They made a mistake reading the x-ray. This is just scar tissue. You’re perfectly fine.”

I believe whole-heartedly that my first response to this life-threatening news is what kept me out of fear, and full of faith, and knowing I would receive a good report from the doctor.

It’s not always easy to respond in faith when a crisis arises, but responding in faith keeps your heart open for the miraculous work of God more than fear ever could.

2.) Choose God as Your Helper, Not as Your Adversary

In the summer of 2009 we received the life changing news that we were going to be parents. Nothing can prepare you for the amount of joy, excitement, nervousness and elation that comes from finding out that you’re pregnant, especially when you’ve been anticipating it.

But by the end of the summer we suffered a miscarriage that would change our lives forever.

The physical pain and emotional confusion of miscarriage is very difficult to describe, mostly because it seems simply surreal, like “This cannot possibly be happening.”

And in spite of the intense anguish that began to set in once I realized the inevitable, something amazing began to take place — out of my spirit, my heart began to sing of the praises of God. Through wailing sobs and heaving gasps of bitterness, my heart exploded with thankfulness at the goodness of God.

You may find that hard to believe, for how could anyone thank God for something so awful? But because I knew that God had not caused or allowed this tragedy, that he was not the source of my pain, he was not the author of death, but life, I simply cried out to him in thankfulness and praise.

In that moment, I knew that the only way I would survive this crisis, is if I trusted in God as my helper, not my adversary.

When crisis hits, most people’s first reaction is to blame God, and ask, “Why!?” And although my emotions were wrecked, and those thoughts did come to my mind, my spirit cast down those negative feelings and vain imaginations, and ministered to me the goodness of God.

• I began praising him that I had gotten pregnant and carried a baby, when the doctor’s said I would never be able to get pregnant.

• I praised him for the eternity that I would get to spend with my baby.

• I praised him for my salvation — that he loved me so much he sent his son Jesus to save me.

For four hours while my body was convulsing to purge the dead baby from my body, my lips praised the Lord and I worshiped him for his awesome goodness.

I don’t say any of this to tell you how spiritual I am, for in myself I could have never produced such a response. But I had convinced myself many years prior, that “God is good all the time, and all the time God is good,” which is why in the midst of such severe tragedy, I could know with confidence that God did not allow the loss of my precious child.

If you ever hope to come through a crisis without crippling baggage that you carry with you for the rest of your life, you must reconcile the tragedy in this world with the goodness of God and understand that God is never the author, (or “allow-er”) of death, tragedy, sickness, pain, loss, or suffering.

3.) Allow Yourself to Feel

One of the difficulties of crisis is that in an attempt to not allow our emotions to control our responses, sometimes we forget to allow ourselves to feel.

But allowing yourself to grieve the sadness that comes with loss, or explore the “What if’s?” is OK. It’s a normal part of the grieving process.

Sometimes allowing yourself to feel in a crisis, is actually about allowing yourself to look down the road to the potential future that might result because of the crisis.

If you’ve suffered abuse, do you imagine yourself staying a victim for the rest of your life? Allowing yourself to see and feel that unpleasant future may be exactly what you need to snap out of the depression you’re experiencing and to determine to choose a different outcome.

Sometimes feeling the negative effects of crisis is so painful, that pain becomes a motivator to pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and start a new chapter in life. It doesn’t mean that you might not have that fear or sadness creep back in once in awhile, but allowing yourself the graciousness to go through these emotions is a way better alternative than burying your feelings.

Allow God to carry your burdens. Cast your cares on him. Allow him to sustain you. He will never let you fall (Psalm 55:22).

4.) If You’re Contributing to Your Crisis – Stop

If you’re going to experience a crisis, the best kind to have is the one you’ve created through your own poor choices. I say this is the best crisis to have, only because this is the kind of crisis you can change!

• If you’ve sown discord in your relationship with your spouse, you can sow peace.

• If you’ve frivolously spent more money on stuff than your future, you can begin investing your resources.

• If you’ve not taken care of your body, you can begin feeding yourself better and exercising more.

If you’re going to come of out a crisis like this, however, not only will you still need to apply the steps listed above, but you’ll have to be honest with yourself about why you got into this mess in the first place.

Here’s a few telling signs, however, that you’re not really ready to get out of the crisis you’ve created.

• Do you constantly vent your frustrations to anyone who will listen?

• Do you frequently ask for prayer for God to help you?

• Have you stopped reading the word, stopped praying, or stopped journaling, because you just don’t get anything out of it?

• Do you keep circling back to the same problems over and over again?

If you find yourself in any of these circumstances, it could be a sign that you’re not really serious about overcoming your crisis.

Whether we’d like to admit it or not, personal choice is often at the heart of many of our toughest circumstances. But the good news is, that getting out of these kinds of crises, is as simple as changing your behavior and doing something different.

To be sure, if you live long enough, you will face a crisis. But you can have hope that the crisis does not need to define you, or control the rest of your future. Regardless if you through a crisis of your own making, or life just “happened” to you, you still hold the precious gift of the freedom of personal choice. You can change the outcome of your future.